31 Days….

Greetings my friends ..... Today is June 10^th, 31 days ago Janelle entered the Kingdom, her eternal home in Heaven.

I wish I could tell you that the days are starting to get a little easier, but that just would not be accurate.  I certainly have started to get back into a bit of a routine, probably go a few hours at a time without some type of reminder that My Janelle is not coming home but then I am right back in the middle of it missing her so much.  Sometimes I can quickly remember something fun and I almost laugh, sometimes I just need to shed a few tears and then I seem to be OK.

The other night I watched all of the videos I had posted including the Celebration Service….I don’t plan on doing that again anytime soon.  The sister’s (and brother-in-law) tribute, from my sister Lynne’s initial comments….tears.  The Celebration Service; I am so appreciative of everybody who had an active role but my two Pastors really hit home on what My Janelle was all about.  In death, she is making a huge impact which I get to experience daily due to the numerous emails & cards directed my way.  This also brings tears to my eyes but they are tears of joy.

I am still planning on starting some reposts of earlier blogs in the near future.   I have not quite decided if I will get into a pattern where I do it every week or just once in a while but I do know that when I start this, I will start at the beginning; April 9, 2009 when she introduced herself to the blogging world.  It will be fun as I provide comments.  I remember just kind of rolling my eyes when she told me that it was only going to cost us $8.95 / month.  Stay tuned.

It does not seem right to not have a picture in the post.  I certainly have hundreds to choose from so you will always get to see one of those Janelle smiles.  How about this one?  Two smiles, my two girls!  This was taken last July 17^th on our front porch.  The ladies had just returned (or were going) to Britt’s wedding shower being hosted next door by Maria, Molly, Chloe and Nora.

 

I think I have been staring at this picture for the last hour.  Is that not a great pair of smiles?  Tears, tears, please go away.

In the weeks ahead, I will continue to share my journey with you.  This next week is kind of a big week for me and prayers would be appreciated.  I am taking my first business trip since last July 11^th.  That is kind of a record for a guy who has been an east coast sales manager in several companies for the last 25 years.  Frankly, I am not sure that I still want to work in this type of capacity.  I can’t afford to retire, but I certainly have thought about simplifying things and reducing my income requirements.  I am thinking this first trip will give me a pretty good idea on what my future will hold.  So a fun note about this trip is that  I get to meet one of you.  Next week I will give you many more details, however one of the many cards Janelle & I have gotten that start out “Hello Janelle/Ken, you don’t know me but…….”;  happens to live in Boston.  She tells me she is a very good cook (Italian).  She had actually planned to come to Charlotte in April to meet Janelle in person and cook for us for a few days but that was right around the time we got our final news from the Dr. so we had to cancel the trip.  This week I am going to get a home cooked meal in the house of somebody I consider a very good friend (and prayer warrior) although we have never met.  Gerry, I can’t wait to meet you and your family.

I also have a couple of vacation type trips planned over the next three weeks.  In my job, I have quite a bit of flexibility.  As long as I can find a Starbucks or Panera Bread, actual an internet connection I can be pretty mobile.  Also in August, I am traveling to the Northwest to spend time with my family (Janelle’s Mother and Brother).  I had hoped I could work it out to participate in Bob’s “Team Janelle” Brain Tumor awareness event.  I have worked it out;  I am now on the team.  I am providing you the link just so you can hear about this.  I am NOT asking you to donate to the cause as many of you have already done this as part of Bob’s participation so please that is not my intention.  That said, if you want to support me please feel the freedom to do so.  My main intention of telling you this is that there are a lot of you who live in the Northwest that I do not personally know but I sure know you based on all of the notes of encouragement I continue to get.  I would invite ALL of you to come on out and walk with us.  If you can’t walk 5K, come on out and just enjoy the day.  I would love to meet as many of you as possible who have been so kind to me and my family.  We will talk more about this as it gets closer as depending on how many are coming we may just have to have a little private gathering before or after the event.

http://www.braintumorcommunity.org/site/TR/Events/BTW-OR/431327577?px=2980430&pg=personal&fr_id=1840

Thank you again for the kindness and the encouragement you are showing toward me and my family.  It really is huge encouragement to me and makes my days a bit brighter.  Until next week………

Ken

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Strength and Peace to You ….. Psalms 29:11

 

Comments

[Kristine]

Thanks Ken...love the picture! Much love, Kris

[Armando Cortez]

Hi Ken! It's so good to see you on here as part of your healing process. I look forward to reading everything you post. What a great picture of your two girls! Will be praying for strength and peace for your upcoming week, and months ahead. Blessings my friend!

[marybethL.]

Hi Ken, yes, that is a great pair of gorgeous smiles. Oh, my heart aches for you and you sadness. I am truly sorry. I am so happy you are getting a chance to meet one of the bloggers. You are all still in my prayers , I find myself looking back at some of the kind comments Janelle left on my blog , I miss her too. Not implying anything like you do. I think lots of us miss her kind encouraging words. Hope Britt and Ian bring their smiles around often. Big hugs and many blessings to you and your family.

[Katy @ Live Laugh Love Craft]

I smile every time I see an update from you. It's good to hear how you are doing. What a beautiful picture that is of Janelle and Brit. You are all still in my thoughts and prayers.

Katy

[SueB]

I LOVE this photo of your girls. It still is unbelievable to me that Janelle is no longer on this earth. Will pray about your forthcoming trip. Also, if you're ever in our area, please let us know. We are currently in Washington State but will be home the first of July.

[Lynn]

Ken, Those smiles are so, so beautiful. And I can feel Janelle's hug for Britt. So, so precious.

Safe travels this week to Boston. We'll be sending lots of hugs and prayers to you.

[Amy Norman]

Ken, I love the picture...it makes me smile to see those two beautiful smiles. I'm praying that you have a safe and good trip to Boston, and that God gives you clear direction. With love,
Amy

[Tricia T]

What a precious loving Mom smile that is. I can only imagine what a sweet mom your Britt will be someday having had such a role model. I will continue to pray for you as you grieve and heal, that you will both rest in the everlasting arms and go forward in the strength and hope of Him who has conquered death forever. Praise the Lord for your testimony in the midst of your pain.

Blessings,

Tricia

[Lee]

You remain in my thoughts and prayers. Hope you have a good trip to Boston. So glad you will be meeting a blog friend IRL. My greatest wish was to meet Janelle...maybe one day our paths will cross. Take care, Ken. Love and hugs to you and the family xxx

[Linda]

Hi Ken, thank you so much for your update each Sunday. It makes me feel like I am still in touch with Janelle. Even though I never met her I read her blog everyday and enjoyed her comments, creative talents and word of God. These smiles from your girls will be with all of us this week. Take care and save travels.

Your friend from MN.
Linda

[Rhonda H]

Beautiful photo Ken! I hope the 1st trip goes well.

[Connie F.]

What a great picture, Ken. Your girls have the most gorgeous smiles ever!! I continue to pray for your comfort and I am hoping your trip goes well. Sending you (((BIG HUGS))).

[Ruth Pierce]

It is good to hear from you Ken. The picture is wonderful! What a great smile on both beautiful ladies! You continue to be in my prayers. Ruth

[Joyce Mehrberg]

Good to hear from you, Ken. That is a wonderful picture you posted. Their smiles are certainly beautiful. I'm glad you are getting to meet a new friend on your next trip.

[lynne]

No 'routine' will 'fix this' but a plan to blog once a week would be a heathy, healing plan. X

[janis]

love the picture - love you! janis

[Tammie Pearson]

Hello Ken. I was a Creative Memories consultant with Jan for years and this news just breaks my heart. I have read a few blogs from time to time on Facebook (the few times I got on and saw a post). They just caught my attention and captured my heart as I read her words and felt the spirit of God within her. She was an awesome friend and so much fun to do crops with. :) Her inspiration goes on!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your families.
Tammie

[Cathy Grady]

Ken,

You and Janelle just never cease to amaze me. First, the way Janelle shared her artistic talents and brought together so many people through Creative Memories and her cards. Then when I reflect on how she so prayerfully and thoughtfully let us - friends she knew and "friends she hadn't met yet" into her world as her illness took over her vibrant life - such a wonderful gift in sharing this heartfelt journey. And, now, your sharing the post-script: your reflections, your life's ups and downs as you move forward in the healing process. This is truly a beautiful (sad, yes, but so poignant) story of love and faith. This written journey will be a most loving testament to Janelle, her family, her faith and her love of life. May God Bless You, Ken, as you continue on this new journey now.
Love, Cathy

[Jill Craft]

Yes, that picture is a winner! Two beautiful girls celebrating a beautiful time in their life. Thanks for continuing to share this time in your life too. The healing/recovery/just getting by time is something we're all going to be facing one time or another, and just as always, you are a wonderfully, honest testimony of how to manage it gracefully. Still praying for you Ken, and for all of Janelle's family.
Blessings.

[Erika T]

Ah Ken I'm so sorry to hear about Janelle. I'm a hit and miss visitor and apparently have "missed" too much. Yes, your Janelle had such a fabulous smile!!!
Let me just say this, God is faithful and though weeping may endure for a night, joy does come in the morning....it's just that we don't know WHICH morning it will be but hang on, it will happen to you.
Blessings to you.

[eleftheria]

I m praying for you Ken,while you are grieving.I hope you ll start healing soon.What an amazing person my Janelle.You are right.Her smile still makes my day brighter...Looking forward to hearing from you next Sunday

[Goodly Creations (Volcano)]

Aloha Ken,
What a wonderful picture of your wonderful Janelle and your beautiful daughter Britt. . . You are a very fortunate man! All the best to you as you continue your journey and try the waters of work/travel again. Please remember that big life changes shouldn't be made for at least a year after such a loss. . . Hang in there, life will get better and the tears will get fewer. . . Enjoy the company of your safe place in the Boston area, I'm sure you will find many like it around the world. . . we all continue to pray for your healing and that of your family.
As was shared above, what an amazing woman Janelle was to share not only her talents but her life as she battled the big "C" as my Uncle calls it. . . What a true blessing that was/is (you'll never know how much so.) Take care and mahalo for including us in your journey. God bless.
Goodly Creations

[Juanita]

I love that you are sharing your healing process with us. Just the other day I was finishing off the day with my prayers and I expressed to God that I was so surprised by Janelle's passing. I had thought his plan was for her to be healed and that would be a sign to other of our God's power. But, I am seeing his plan unfold in another way and it is amazing. I love that you are reaching out to her blog following and sharing your journey with us. I pray that the Lord will continue to grant you peace and grace and healing and, of course, that you will hold you love for Janelle and her memory close.

[Patsy L'Hommedieu]

Dear Ken,

So glad that you are going to continue to post and give us specific ways we can pray for you. I think of Janelle so often. We'll be praying for you on this first trip.
Love, Patsy and Doug

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